Showing posts with label credit cards. Show all posts
Showing posts with label credit cards. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Acting Squirrelly

Ten minutes after Morgan’s grandmother and I hugged her goodbye and left her in the massive Third Avenue North Dorm at New York University, I opened my purse to discover that I had some of her important documents.

We were already in a cab bound for our hotel, and she didn’t need the documents immediately, so I promised to take them to her the next evening, after she returned from the day’s Welcome Week activities at Madison Square Garden and after I finished watching the day matches at the US Open.

Now, according to my son, whose tennis lessons have cost me the equivalent of a Mercedes, I “suck” at tennis. But I’m quite possibly the best in the world at watching tennis, especially in beautiful weather. It was a spectacular day. John Isner, the former University of Georgia star, won his match. Rafael Nadal and his muscles meanered past me as I sat eating lunch. I saw James Blake take the first two sets of his match.

At the end of Blake’s second set, Morgan called to say that I needed to vacate my expensive seat at the US Open immediately to go search my hotel room for her lost credit card.

“But I straightened up the room after you left, Morgan, and I didn’t see your credit card.”

“Just go look, Mom.”

“Can I wait until James Blake is finished playing?”

“I’m really worried that my card got stolen. Please just go look now.”

I left the US Open, warily trudging past the huge signs warning that there was no re-entry after I exited the grounds. And of course, as soon as I passed the point of no re-entry, I got a text from Morgan saying she’d found the credit card.

But she still needed her opening week schedule and vouchers. So when the shuttle from the Open dropped me off at my hotel, I jumped into a cab and told the driver to take me to Third and Eleventh.

I got to her dorm, walked into the lobby, and called to tell her I was there. She came downstairs, took her papers, and thanked me.

“Do you want me to take you to dinner?” I asked, fully expecting her to jump at the invitation. Her response brought back memories of a little squirrel I hadn’t thought about in years.

When we were teenagers, my brother, Beau, found a baby squirrel in the woods. He brought it home, and my mother helped him bottle feed the tiny, hairless rodent, much to the consternation of our dachshund, Tubbs. It was against the natural order of things, heretical even, for a dachshund’s family to harbor a squirrel, the bane of every dachshund’s existence.

Beau named the squirrel Sammy, and he grew into a fine-looking adult squirrel who seemed to love living in our screened porch. He spent his days jumping from the porch swing to the screened sides of the porch and climbing up and down the screened walls. He loved my mom and my brother, perching on their shoulders to eat and cocking his cute little head sideways when they talked to him.

But one day my parents broke the sad news to Beau that Sammy was grown. It was time to for him to make his way in the wild. They took the squirrel outside to the woods behind out house, and they set him down. The second his little feet hit the ground, Sammy took off.

So yesterday when I offered to feed her, Morgan tilted her head to the side, considering my invitation. And then she said, “Well, I already kind of had a papaya smoothie, and my friends are waiting for me upstairs. So I guess not.” I hugged her goodbye and watched her disappear back into her dorm.

And like Sammy the squirrel, my girl never looked back.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Well-Heeled Pack Mule with a Bad Attitude

I’m pretty sure all 10,000 incoming freshman at NYU were in the Bed, Bath, and Beyond (aka Bed, Bath, and Behind) on Sixth Avenue in Manhattan yesterday afternoon.

Well, all 10,000 except for Morgan. I was there in her place because she was with her Nana at the NYU bookstore buying her first semester books.

I’ll go ahead and admit right now that I was not happy about being there, because the day before, we’d been in the same store, and it cost me $700 that time. And I was happy to get out of the place having secured her towels, comforter, sheets, desk lamp, and, amazingly, two bottle openers for that price.

Why was I happy to only spend $700? Because all week, Morgan had been hinting that she needed Frette linens and an Ed Hardy comforter.

Frette, aside from the fact their sheets cost in the thousands, is on the upper east side on Madison Avenue.

Ed Hardy is in the Meatpacking District.

In other words, the child believes her mother and grandmother are well-heeled pack mules sporting no-limit credit cards.

After the smackdown in which I explained that we were NOT going to cover all of Manhattan in an effort to make hers the most expensively furnished dorm room at NYU, she miraculously found an Ed Hardy duvet cover at the Bed, Bath, and Behind. It was on sale for $250. And then she found a $700 goose down duvet to go inside the cover.

Another smackdown ensued, and she settled for a $200 goose down duvet that wasn’t nearly as fluffy. Boofuckinghoo.

So the next day, I was beyond miffed when Nana sent me back for a mattress pad, shelving, under-bed storage, scissors, and trash bags. I got a cab and made my way to the store. I fought my way through all 10,000 shoppers and secured the necessary items. And then I had the brilliant thought that went something like Shit. How am I supposed to carry a bulky mattress pad, a big-ass under-the-bed plastic storage box, and a heavy box containing a wire 2-shelf storage unit requiring assembly all by myself?

I did it by ditching the storage stuff. There were six big cardboard boxes destined for the dumpster in that dorm room. She can store her damn stuff in those boxes. I paid for the remaining items and made my way back to NYU. And that’s when Nana called to tell me that Morgan’s books were too heavy for the two of them to carry. I needed to drop my things off at the dorm and then hoof it to the bookstore to help them carry three bags of books.

I obeyed. When I got there, I looked in the bags to see what books were required for Morgan’s first semester of college at NYU.

And that’s when outfitting my girl for college got really exciting for me. Those three big bags of books, to my mind, are my kid’s future, the path to being able to one day buy for herself all the Frette linens her little heart desires. They weren't heavy at all.